The First Day of School at Your University- Landry Pulliam
The first day of classes, or syllabus day, on campus is always interesting to say the least. There are so many different kinds of students on campus. Being a transfer student, I have gotten to see this twice now on two different campuses, so I’ve had my share of experience. I’ll go through a few types of students you probably encountered on your first day back to campus.
The Lost Freshman
This kid will leave his dorm an hour in advance, walking around trying to find where his first class is using his campus map before gathering up the nerve to ask literally anybody where his Intro to Communications class is. These people can also easily be identified by their lanyards with their school ID’s attached, or also because of the fact that they dress exactly how they did in high school.
Strange Kid Trying to Make Friends Quickly
You saw this kid from a mile away and knew immediately that you do not want to talk to this kid. Then you walk into the auditorium where your class is and by some miracle he/she decides to sit by you when there are approximately 150 other empty seats. They try to make some icebreaker statement like: “This professor’s ratings were good; this class should be easy,” or they introduce themselves like you even care what their name is: “My name is Tyler Paschal.” That’s cool bro. Then, if you are really lucky, this weird person will also smell like the shower in their dorm/apartment is broken or that they use the same body wash that old men use in nursing homes.
Student Trying to Become Pals with the Professor
These students will be one of the first ones to arrive to class and introduce themselves to the professor, saying things like, “I’m really looking forward to your class, and I love Biology.” No you don’t; nobody loves Biology. Do you even know what you just said? Most of the time, the professor won’t care anyway. He/she is with this specific group of students for one semester and have been through thousands of students, and you think you’re special?
Foreign Exchange Students Ripping Cigarettes
These particular foreign students can be seen, well, basically everywhere. Ninety-nine percent of the time they are right outside of a building. They can be seen chiefing cigarettes like there will soon be a Great Cigarette Famine of 2013. I’m not sure if cigarettes are hard to find in their respective countries or if they are highly inflated over there, but one thing is for sure, most foreign exchange students I’ve experience love them. Not much more can be said of this phenomenon besides a word of advice: Know that you will smell like the sweet scent of Malboro Red if you choose to engage with one who fits this category.
Editor’s Note: As much as people complain about smoking on campus, we subconsciously know that every foreign exchange student casually smoking outside of a building looks cooler than the locals ever can.
The 40-50 Year Old Student
Last but not least, there is the man or woman old enough to be your parent sitting next to you as your peer. This person probably has been working at a print shop since they graduated high school and has now decided it is a great time to go back to school and earn their degree to enrich their lives. These people are usually the same people who try to become pals with the teacher. I mean they’re basically the same, except one has been sculpting young minds for twenty years while the other one works the night shift at Kinko’s. Regardless, it is great that you decided to enhance your life and get a degree, but please don’t talk to me about how you didn’t have computers to take notes when you grew up. Because I don’t care.
These are just some of the people who stick out to me on the first day of classes. Leave a comment and let me know what categories of people you have noticed. Also, follow me on twitter: @DaRealLandryP
Editor’s “Blanket” Note: All of these students are valued equally, and if you find yourself in or around one of these categories, know that we want you to keep visiting more than anyone. Unless you smell weird. That we cannot deal with.