Day 35

Day 35- Two Plus Two Equals Socialism- Nick Fuentes

Focusing on classes can be so difficult sometimes. I’ve tried to stick to what I’ve officially dubbed the “Lefterson Reconnaissance and Survival Initiative,” meant to unveil the Helltop for the dreadful right wing factory university that it is and to make sure I don’t become brainwashed. All that I do in secret to gather “intel” is beginning to affect my grades. I may or may not be the worst student in my Calculus class, and I’m basing that off of the exam score ranges posted by the professor. Only one person received a grade on our latest exam that fell in the range of scores between 40-50 out of 100. As I read the ranges posted on the blackboard, I looked down at the grade on my exam… 41 out of 100. After the curve (I excel and impress in all of my theater classes; my acting instrument is always finely tuned).

Yeah, I said after the curve. It was more like the curve from hell, which seems overly fitting. I know what you’re thinking though; I must have gotten like a thirty-something for the curve to have bumped my grade up to a measly 41. Seems logical, but that’s not how I received such a low grade. The professor explained her grading curve as such: in order to foster a student body, which believes fully in capitalism and not in socialism, she curves exams in the opposite direction of a normal grading curve.

“Some people work very hard for what they have, others are lazy and expect things to be given to them by the government and other productive taxpayers,” she said to the class as we all grumbled over the awful grade ranges she was writing on the board. Some people actually received legit 90s on the exam, but rewarding those people with a curve and giving them practically perfect scores wouldn’t get the message of anti-socialism across to us. “Collecting all the resources and distributing them among those who don’t earn them and those who do earn them doesn’t make everyone better off in the long run; it just ruins the whole system this great nation was founded upon,” she said. So to make sure that everyone works for what they receive, she screws all of our grades to model the effects of a system that isn’t financially sound and doesn’t reward those who deserve reward, but rather merits laziness and piggy backing on someone else’s success.

So now for a little math: my original score was a 51 and apparently the next lowest score was a 61. 61 minus 51 equals ten, so ten points was the official curve (I’m failing Calculus, not Arithmetic). No one was happy about it, and it’s no secret that I’m the one bringing down the herd (What’s a group of Hilltoppers called? “Herd” is the word for now). The ones with high grades even cornered me after class to offer some scathing motivation for me to try harder next time, though I couldn’t take them seriously with their pocket protectors and calculators in hand. Until we all work very hard to earn A’s on our Calculus exams, we’re going to have to deal with the socialism curve.

I’m in need of a tutor, an identical twin with an aptitude for Calculus to take the exams for me (and restraining orders on all the grade snobs in my class) if I’m going to make it through this course in one piece.

Also can someone explain to me when we started using letters in math problems instead of numbers?


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